WARNING: IT'S LONG
I got mugged at the D.C. Zoo while buying Original Pringles for $1.50. Ting was with me when this happened.
It happened here:
I entered the zoo with the Gardena group that I came to D.C. with, but I split off from them because they wanted to look at boring sloths or something, while I wanted to search for some awesome Cheetahs and even more awesome Pandas. Mr. and Mrs. Park (no relation to our Mr. Park) was at the entrance waiting for us. I was chilling around with Ting when I spotted the Pringles Machine, and since it was nearly 12 hours since I last ate I didn't care how expensive the Pringles were. I went to buy some Pringles to fill my hunger.
Suddenly, a group of eight people swarmed me and asked me for a dollar, which I was going to give them since I always give dollars to people who ask for them (if I have money). Then they told me to give them my wallet and camera. My wallet had $150, and my camera was $300, so hell no was I going to give them my wallet and camera.
Seven of them surrounded me. Ting said one of them held them back. Thanks Ting, one person stopped you, while I successfully fended off seven people. Ting's either faced someone ten times his size, or I'm Superman. I'm pretty sure I'm Superman.
They tried to grab my wallet and camera from my hands, and miserably failed. These guys, the same age as me, were weak, probably weaker than Ting when he was five. Three of them held back my arms, while two of them tried to grab my wallet out of my left hand. It took five people to disable me and they still were unsuccessful in taking my wallet. One of these a******* blindside hit me on my upper left eyebrow. The punch didn't hurt at all, since I was sleepy, but I was pissed off at the fact that even though it was 7 against 1 with my arms held back, they still had to cheapshot me. If my arms weren't tied back, I would have thrown a fist and knocked someone out.
The other two decided to smacktalk me. I couldn't understand what they were saying, partly because they talked like they didn't pass the fifth grade. Too many grammatical mistakes made it impossible to comprehend them. I think one of them told me to give them my walrus or else he'll bill me up, or something like that.
Ting was still held back by that one person or something, I don't know what he was doing actually. I hope he was calling for help or something, or else I'll lose all respect for him for not standing up for someone who is ganged up by seven people. I managed to escape my five capturers, who still weren't able to knock the wallet OR my camera from my hands. I looked at one of them, who was still asking me for my wallet (if he wanted it he could have got it from my hands when his "friends" held me back), so I told him to f*** off. At that point, I was pissed off that I was in the middle of the freakin' park and NO ONE decided to help me, and the fact that I almost got mugged. I walked away, and Ting followed me, when one of those muggers decided AGAIN to blindside hit me, this time barely missing my temple and hitting my right ear.
The punch didn't hurt, it felt like getting slapped by a pillow, but that isn't the point- you have seven people with you, and you have to sock a skinny 5'10 Asian guy WITH AN ITEM IN BOTH OF HIS HANDS when he's back is turned to you? Maybe they were scared of Ting's blue jacket, since it looks like it can carry like 28 guns. If you're going to start a fight, at least fight fair.
I was going to throw a swing. I didn't care that it was 8 against 2 (well, more like 8 against 1), I probably could have knocked out two or three before getting owned by their numbers. They cheapshot me not once but twice, and they probably would have done it ten times more if I didn't turn to face them.
Luckily, a Smithsonian Zoo worker intervened, props to that guy. The muggers suddenly stopped "fighting" and accused me of calling them the n word and that I started it. Please, look at me, I'm going to be the one that starts stuff? They were wearing thug clothes, too, and talking like thugs, and acting like thugs, but they weren't thugs, they were lame ass posers who couldn't win a fight against two of the most passive guys in the world, even if it's 8 against 2.
One of them asked me for a buck again, so I gave him one. Not because I wanted to him to leave me alone, but because if I didn't, he'll probably cheapshot me again (probably knee me down under or something), and then I'll probably be so pissed off that I would have thrown a left hook and knock that f***** out. Then a fight would have erupted, and I probably win, but then I would have been questioned by the police, probably jailed for fighting on FEDERAL LAND (those muggers were flatout idiots), and be on the next flight back to Hacienda Heights (which I'll have to pay for), with a day left on the trip. I wasn't going to get a black mark on my name and pay $250 for a flight just because a guy decided to be a d******** and blindside hit me. I think one dollar was a decent price to avoid everything.
The muggers left soon after, like the wimps they are. I mean, it was only one guy that intervened, so it would still be 8 against 3. I'm guessing that they knew they couldn't win unless they had at least four people on one person. Hell, I'll be surprised if they ever won a fight fairly. I'm pretty sure a 10 year old girl scout could defeat all of them at once. They literally walked away, still talking trash, bragging about how they "won" even though they couldn't beat up ME. I was still walking. I was still breathing. I was still alive. Those two shots did nothing to me, and they still walked away. They can't even finish what they started. Those muggers were pathetic.
While Ting and I were walking back, I immediately asked him why he didn't help me. He said one of them held him back. Not wanting to flip out on him for being such a wimp (sorry Ting), I told him that if he was the one that got mugged, I would have defended him, and I mean it, I would have defended anyone in that situation. He told me to go to Mr. and Mrs. Park to tell them, and the first thought was "why the hell did you not do it, you could have ran to them", and my second though was "I didn't get hurt, so what's the point", but I decided to do it anyway because I reeeeeeally wanted my dollar back, because there was a poker game that night in my hotel room and that one dollar really could have helped me win more money (I'm +10). I reported it to Mr. and Mrs. Park, they became concerned and took me to officials, where I gave my report to a nice cop who sincerely wanted to help me. Also, the guy who helped stop everything also gave his report, so I shook his hand and thanked him for helping me. I wish there were more people like them at the park, it really could have helped.
Later, Mr. Park, Ting, and I went exploring in the park while the cops were looking for the muggers (they probably left through the back like cowards). Mrs. Park told me to leave my camera behind, so I don't have any pictures of the lazy panda or the millions of frogs in the reptile exhibit (God, I hate frogs). I only went exploring to look for the muggers. I wanted revenge so badly. I didn't want to do it the right way through the justice system, I wanted to do it the wrong way with my fists, black eyes, and maybe some bloody faces.
To cheer myself up, I bought a tiger at the shop. I named it Hobbes, so in the future, I'm going to name my son Calvin, and then give Calvin Hobbes so they can make their own comic book together (I know it sounds weird, but you'll be doing weird stuff too ten minutes after you got mugged). It looks like this:
While walking through the park, Mr. Park told me a lot of stuff about how the muggers would all become criminals doing time in jail, and that karma would benefit me (it sort of didn't, I was almost late for my plane back by ten minutes, my metro ticket didn't work so I always had to tell the metro operator to let me in, and I was always sleepy on the trip).
When the zoo trip ended, I admitted that a lot of s*** happened to me on this to D.C, but there were also a lot of good things, such as getting universal healthcare passed through a Mock House, even though I was like one of ten liberals while the other 130 people were hardcore conservatives who hate socialism and higher taxes. I saw a lot of memorials and monuments, and my favorite had to be FDR's, because FDR had so many quotes that were so quotable and awesome. I went to Capitol Hill, and went into the House Gallery and saw two or three people argue their point. I visited the Archives and passed the Devil Nancy Pelosi's office, went to the malls, and rode the smelly metro stations. I also stepped in the Senate, where I'll take over Sen. Boxer's office someday. Did I mention that Sen. Boxer passed us and no one recognized her, not even Mrs. Park or me (who loves California politics)? She dyed her hair blonde, that's why. Sen. Boxer, you're not famous enough for people to recognize your face yet. Everyone knows you as a brunette, so stay as one. She didn't even say hi to us, or acknowledge us. She just passed us with a cold shoulder. How did we elect a person like her? She's so fake, I hope she loses this year.
The best part of the trip was seeing the people. Our group saw the back of McCain's head (he's always smiling). Another group saw Barack Obama. We met with aids from Feinstein and Boxer (Feinstein's boring, but Boxer's kind of interesting in a way), and Maxine Watters, the representative from the 35th district of California (who is on the top 10 list of the most corrupt politicians in America, I knew I saw her name before). But none of these were involved with us, so Mr. Park, Ting, and I went off to our own adventure and met Grace Napolitano and Obama:
And this general guy, whose statue was so formidible it made me sweat. If he's fighting/eading in the conflict, I'm glad that we have soldiers like him fighting/leading for America.
And of course, we met Ron Paul, the most awesome politician in Congress.
Overall, this trip was definately worth $1400, even though it was awkard for only two people from LAHS to go to D.C. with 13 other kids from Gardena to met with 120+ kids (some deaf) from states like Minnesota (who has the nicest people ever), Nebraska (who has some of the nicest but also some of the most arrogant people ever), Illinois, North Dakota, Michigan, and New York. 138/140 of the people there were some of the coolest people you'll ever meet, it's sad that two of them were the kind you never ever wanted to meet.
You guys should have came. Ting's not liberal enough to debate all of those hardcore conservatives out there. We could have all brought some liberal blast from the West to counter the Reagan lovers (no hate on Reagan) of the Midwest. Literally, everyone was Republican. They asked all the people who were liberal to stand up, and I was the first one to do so, and then like nine other people did so, and when they asked for conservatives to stand up, 100+ people stood.
And because of this, I would have paid $100,000 to go to D.C. for the trip, because not only did I explore places like the Library of Congress, not only did I see and meet politicians like Ron Paul, not only did I partake in activities like Mock Congress to debate on Healthcare (which we should do in Government class by the way), but just meeting my roommates from Minnesota and just learning about their views of politics, along with the 100+ people that were not my roommates, made this trip totally awesome.
Plus, I missed a week of school and got extra credit for AP Government, so I couldn't lose on this trip anyway.
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